Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Jaundiced Frankenstein...

I had a hard time concentrating yesterday afternoon and also sleeping last night. The reason is a troublesome picture the little one brought home from school. My chuckleheaded owner and his wife thought it was grand - like everything else these kids bring home - so they gave it an honored place on top of the fireplace in the living room. Of course this is where I spend most of my time so now I have to put up with this monstrous picture - I can't even relax in my own room anymore. Oh how these people love to torment me! 

One can only describe this picture as a portrait of a Jaundiced Frankenstein with lazy eye. You know those eyes some people have where one eye looks straight out and the other shoots off to the side making it difficult to tell whom they're speaking to. It does make for some great fun though when people are gathered around in circles at parties. Anyway, so this jaundiced Frankenstein with lazy eye is now ruining my life. I swear those eyes follow me wherever I go. At first I tried to block it out by doing my normal routine - lying on the rug, chewing, and scratching but I just couldn't make it work. I kept getting that odd feeling of being watched. Now I'm afraid to even go into that room.

 I did try burning some sage last night with the hopes of vanquishing the bad vibes but the house started making those late night creaking sounds so I spent the rest of the night hiding under a bed. Why do houses always make those creaking/settling sounds at night when one is freaked out? You never hear them at any other time. Oh well, so now I'm thinking about having the local priest stop by with some holy water to do a cleansing - it can't hurt. Have a great day folks!