Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Tired of the construction...

What the hell is going on next door? I've completely worked myself up into a lather having to baby-sit all the construction crews at the neighbor's house over the past few months. I mean this is absolutely ridiculous! I'm beginning to think that we are living next-door to the Winchester Widow. The really weird thing is that even with all the construction, you really can't tell that anything is different. What are they doing with all the wood and materials that have been delivered? 
I'm thinking that maybe they're building some type of sophisticated crime fighting lair under her house - like Batman's. Who knows, maybe in a couple of months, a new crime fighter will arrive on the scene, dressed in a moo moo, with a jet powered walker and utility purse. She'll fight for noise ordinances in Los Angeles, work election polling stations, and greet people at the local markets - all before her bedtime at 6pm. Of course this could also just be the long awaited subway line connecting Burbank to downtown Los Angeles. I hope they put in parking because I don't want strange people leaving their cars in our driveway.
Anyway, if it hasn't been bad enough policing her normal yard workers - now I have to supervise these crews as well? And if I don't who will -the old lady herself? Doubtful - she's too busy hiring workers to enlarge the mansion. My owner? Please... he can't even spell supervise! Besides, what's the chances of anyone listening to, "Sir Doofulous" mouthing orders while wearing his plaid shorts, open toe sandals, and black socks. No, I believe this is all going to fall on me. And by the look of things, I have my work cut out for me. 
First of all those workers need to know that cats and other vermin are not allowed on that site. I don't care who owns the land - we just don't need any more degenerates in this neighborhood. Secondly, workers need to bring me sandwiches everyday - ones with good meats and cheeses - no bologna! And last but not least, construction will not occur between the hours of 9 AM - 6 PM or 10 PM - 6AM because I am napping and do not want to be disturbed. Well, that just about covers it. I guess I'll go out to set the ground rules. Well ... at least as soon as the goon opens the door to let me out. I'll have to go stand in front of the door until he notices me. Have a good day all!

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